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February 04 2017

Conservative Party Admits Cutting NHS Funding To Kill Off The Lower Classes To Ensure 1000 Year Tory Reich

The Conservative party has admitted that the real reason they have been cutting support and funding for the NHS is to "kill off as many of the plebs as we can."

Jacob Rees-Mogg outlined the current strategy.

"Everyone knows that all the wheelchair-bound, mentally ill and even just people who have taken too many ecstasy tablets and had to go to A and E are all more likely to vote Labour. Since we rolled out our "Fit For Work" tests, we've seen record numbers of disabled people commit suicide, or even just plain starve to death. Coincidentally the number of Labour voters seems to be dropping correspondingly."

Responding to public criticism, Prime Minister Darth May said "What people have to remember is that the sick and the infirm are quite literally a drain on this country, which is very unpatriotic. We need to help our beloved NHS by offloading the work from them onto funeral parlours instead, which as they are private sector are far better equipped to handle it."