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March 14 2017

Question Time Audience Member Asks Who Will Work For Inhuman Slave Wages If Not Immigrants?

A recent BBC Question Time audience member has put forward the best argument for the dangers of Brexit anyone has heard so far.

After this question received some mockery on social media, The Daily Online reached out to the woman to give her a chance to respond to some of her detractors.

"Well, I obviously stand by everything I said. The immigrant worker is vastly superior to the British worker in pretty much every respect. They are able to house themselves cheaper, by sharing living space. I've seen some immigrants manage to pack as many as fifteen people living into a one bedroom flat."

"How can the British even compete?"

"Any British worker would want to live with only one, maybe at the most two people in that flat. Madness! Utterly unnaffordable, at least where I live in London. It's these unrealastic expectations of non-slavery that have doomed the plebian classes to get ideas above their station for centuries now."

We asked what her proposed solution to this would be.

"Well, with the rise of automation this problem will be solved pretty soon. As soon as we have robots that can make me coffee and wipe my arse when I'm old and dying, we'll just let the poor die off. Cut all benefits, kill the NHS, and stop putting their fires out. If that doesn't work, we'll use the new robot workers to kill them off"

"I've bought an Amazon Echo and hooked it up to an Internet Of Things Coffee Maker at home, so I can tell it 'Make me a coffee'' and it does that. I can't wait for the 'kill all the poor' upgrade 20 years from now."